Todd Phillips
Not to be confused with the director of the Hangover movies, Todd Phillips is a man from Cullman, Alabama whom people know for his bigoted tweets aimed towards gay marriage and other races that aren't white. He is also a pessimist towards everything modern, especially music and television networks. Early life Todd Phillips was born on December 17th, 1989 (which coincidentally, was the exact day The Simpletons premiered) in Cullman, Alabama. He grew up listening to artists/bands from the '90s and watching television shows from the '90s. He also enjoys a lot of shows from the early 2000s, including the most popular and longest running Nicktoon, SpongeBob SquarePants. He spent his entire childhood living as a '90s kid in the '90s, not a care in the world because he was just a wee lad (WEE!). The start of his cynicism towards the world began around 2007, which was the year he turned 18 and officially became an adult. He believes that the downfall of Nickelodeon began with the show "iCarly" and its main star, Miranda Cosgrove. He has stated before that he liked "Drake & Josh" but he also hated the character she played in the show, Megan Parker. Her actions towards Drake and Josh may have been symbolism towards how she ruined Nickelodeon and made watching the network unbearable for Todd. He believes that the sign of the end of times began when the Bush era ended and Barack Obama was elected president in the 2008 and 2012 elections. It was because of these two actions that made him bitter and cynical towards everything today. Education It is unknown as to what schools Phillips used to attend. In fact, it is unknown if he even attended school at all. Todd has stated that he did graduate from college but some have rumored that this is false, given the fact that he still types like someone who doesn't believe in the Shift key and spells as well as a brain-dead monkey. Contradictions * In one video, he claims that new SpongeBob is better than old SpongeBob and calls everyone who thinks otherwise "crybabies" and tells them that they need to move on. Now this wouldn't be much of an issue if this statement didn't come from a '90s kid who prefers old cartoons over new ones and doesn't like to watch new shows. * On the same topic too, one of the "new episodes" he lists is "Squilliam Returns", an episode that unlike the other two (House Fancy and Squid Baby) came out before the movie. A Season 3 episode that came out 17 years ago in 2002. Who in the right hell would call themselves a SpongeBob fan yet get a fact like this completely wrong? * When it comes to bad words like "fuck" or "shit", he has to censor them. But when it comes to worse words like "retard", it's perfectly fine to say them uncensored! What the hell is wrong with fucking shitty Alabama anyway? * He hates Ajit Pai yet idolizes Donald Trump, who made him the chairman of the FCC. Politics When it comes down to politics, he believes in one saying: "Heil Trump". Yes, he praises this curly haired Cheeto for doing stuff like building pointless walls to keep immigrants out. In reality, I think he should also build one for intolerant, bigoted rednecks like Todd if he truly wants to "Make America Great Again". Call the doctor too, because Todd has a severe case of Islamphobia. And unlike polio, it unfortunately has no cure when it comes to stubborn people like Todd. Let's take the Christchurch shootings for an example. Now most Americans around that time would probably feel sad about these shootings. Not Todd. Instead, he chooses to agree with some random Australian senator that it was because of Muslim immigration that this happened. Naturally, people replied to his tweet by saying that he's horrible for even saying that as his opinion and being the stubborn tool that he is, Todd replies to all of their tweets saying "it's because kamehameha said so". It is unknown as to what he means by this. Either "kamehameha" is one of the phrases in Dragon Ball Z that turns you into a yellow-haired superman or a friend of his who does nothing but overdose on Budweiser and make insensitive remarks towards people who aren't white. Take your pick. Todd's against gay marriage, surprise surprise, and his reasoning behind that is that every girl in Alabama chooses to be lesbian. That's right, the first second you take your step into Alabama, you automatically lose your boyfriend and go horny for Alabama girls instead, that makes a whole lot of fucking sense. Though that's probably their excuse for not wanting to date a man who makes controversial tweets on Twitter that are either misogynistic, intolerant, or just plain wrong.